For Immediate Release: New Pre-Hacked Firewalls Streamline Security Operations March 17, 2025 San Jose, CA - BitFryer, creator of cloud-first, AI-powered security solutions, has announced the new SteelWool line of pre-hacked firewalls. Available as appliances or VMs, SteelWool lets customers pick one of three pre-installed malware packages: ransomware, exfiltration, or corporate espionage. Typhoon-tier customers can also choose the criminal gang or nation-state actor that owns their boxes. In today’s world of cloud, AI, and software, firewall makers have become incapable of writing secure code....
Appliance company implementing AI everyone is asking for
Burlington, VT 16-Feb-2025 A hush falls over the literal tens of people waiting in a sparsely occupied auditorium in the basement of the Burlington public library as Herman Aldo, CEO and chief scientist for start up AI company Innovappliance is set to unveil the new AI powered dish washer and toaster oven combination appliance. “Welcome all, today I think we all know why we’re here. It’s been a grueling 4 months of work, but we think we’ve combined the three things that americans want: reliable toasters, clean dishes, and AI....
CFO provides valuable input on developer desktop purchase request
07-Feb-2025 Belding, MI Veteran devloper Lydia Emerson has spoken exclusively to JFI to report that, thankfully, her CFO has made his expertise available for advisement and unilateral adjustment of the technical specifications of her new development workstation. “As a developer that needs to run multiple containers and sometimes even full-blown kubernetes for my day to day job, I thought I was making a fairly reasonable request for a laptop that has a decent amount of CPU and memory....
Fringe internet protocol sparks lively debate
A recent threat on popular news aggregation site has sparked fury, outrage, irreverence, and rebellion amongst the internet protocol elite operators. With a common theme of “I heard what happened 25 years ago and came angrily to this thread to air my personal and significant grievances”, many contributors were quick to offer expertise as to how the internet protocol IP version 6 - “IPv6” to those fringe players in “the biz” - should have been developed, how it should have been backwards compatible with IPv4, or how there was no need for an updated protocol at all....
Profits soaring in otherwise stunted economy
“Shareholders are estatic.” proclaimed Idell Luettgen, product manager over licensing while speaking on a monthly directors call. “Well, the new licensing model is proving to be a little bit of a heavy lift for us here in TAC.” snapped Franz Nyström, director of North American TAC. “The customers are struggling to understand why certain things that were once included as an entitlement are now a licensed option, especially after a forced “security patch” version of the firmware....